


The Galaxy in our Hands

by Flecha77



Category: Star Wars - All Media Types
Genre: Episode VIII, F/M, NSFW, Slow Burn, Star Wars: The Last Jedi
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-01-02
Updated: 2018-01-09
Packaged: 2019-02-27 06:03:12
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 4
Words: 9,162
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13241988
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Flecha77/pseuds/Flecha77
Summary: This story begins in Supreme Leader Snokes chamber, moments after Rey and Kylo Ren have defeated Snoke and his entourage of Redcoats. But, in the timeline, Rey said yes to Kylo’s offer. That is where this story is born.Rey and Ben Solo attempt to escape their past despite everything calling them back to their history. They will sacrifice everything to escape the chains of their lives and begin new, with each other, with the Galaxy in their hands.





	1. Beginning

**Author's Note:**

> As in the work description, this takes place in an alternate reality where Rey says yes to Ben Solos offer to rule the galaxy together. The story begins at that immediate moment after Kylo Ren has killed Snoke, they have fought side by side against the Redcoats and they have had a heart to heart moment about where Rey belongs in all this. I hope you thoroughly enjoy; thanks! xx

“Okay,”  
The answer seemed clear at first, and then foggy. His words echoed between them,  
You’re nothing.  
But not to me.  
No Jedi... no Sith  
Her previous hatred for him at started to chip away from their first moment of gimping into each other’s mind. Their unbreakable connection that tethered them together. The connection that scared her more than her own power. The power they held together was worse, destructive and commanding. A bomb waiting to be tapped.

The moment Rey pronounced those four small letters, her mind flew out of her head and into the stars outside the chrome walls of that First Order ship. She surprised herself with the assertion in her voice, the conviction she placed behind her answer. Her mind had not yet made a decision but her heart had. 

Her palms gushed with sweat as her placed hers in his leather clocked hands. She saw something flash over his face, briefly, fleeting with every second that passed. Was it surprise? No, more than that. Just as complex as the emotions conflicting and whirling inside her own heavy chest. Not surprise, not shock... fear? The fear dissipated quickly, his fierce eyes narrowed, his face could not stop the smirk slipping to his lips. It was small and almost missable, the heat between them, the connection. It was more powerful than before. All of the girls worry and fear and disbelief to her answer stopped in that moment. She was not afraid, she was not holding on to the past nor what she thought was her path. She let go. 

Just as her grasp tightened, gravity betrayed her,

“Ben!” The ground between them broke. 

She screamed as she fell back, tumbling towards the limp, Redrobes behind her, her hand outstretched toward the black figure above her who had fallen onto his knees,

“Rey!” 

She heard him scream before he hurled himself towards the ruble that had accumulated around her. Before crashing into the crumbling wall behind her she felt leather wrap around her. She wound herself cradled into his chest as he took the blow of hitting the stiff wall. He screamed in agony as they were tossed about the wall while the room was torn apart. 

On one final fall, they were both able to find their feet and stand, Ben significantly more hurt than Rey, groaning as he extended his back.

Her ears rang and her vision was clouded as she took in her surroundings. She struggled to decipher what was actually happened, the ground had simply crumbled below her. She felt Bens hand grasp onto her forearm, he seemed equally foggy as he ground his teeth together through the pain,

“Are you alright?” He asked, wincing. 

He was apparently more concerned with her well being, not his own after breaking her fall with his body,

“Yes, but we need to get out of here,” she responded, grasping his shoulder as the ship shook and more rubble fell from the walls,

“There!” She screamed amongst the sound of titanium bending beneath them, she had found a way to climb back up to the sturdy part of the ship. 

She was already halfway up the climb when Ben caught up. She extended her hand down to where Ben struggled to find his footing as the ship shifted again, sending debris over head. 

“Take my hand,” she shouted above the rumble,

“I can do it!” Her growled, sending recoil through her fingertips. 

A foolish part of her was surprised at his anger towards her.

Ben balled his hands into fists, before Rey could question what he was doing he had landed beside her on one knee, 

“Follow me,” he said with the wave of a finger, his cape trailing behind him, torn,

“What’s happening?” She struggled to speak above the ship.

He did not answer, simply continuing forwards without looking in her direction in the slightest,

“Ben!” She barked, angered at her lack of information,

“I don’t know, Rey!” He screamed over his shoulder, “All I know is we have to get to the most stable part of the ship.” 

Ben struggled to rip the lift doors open, it was the only way out and Rey feared they were locked in,

“Help me,” he sighed, obviously upset he couldn’t do it on his own. 

They both dug their fingers into wither side of the doors, finally being able to pry them open when they worked together. The lift was of course, not there,

“We have to climb,” Rey said,

“What?” He furrowed his eyebrows,

“Yes, it’s the only way out.” 

Rey went first, she placed her hands and feet into the grate along the lift walls, climbing down, back into the center of this shop. Ben was above her, clearly struggling more than her but he was determined to make his way down. 

“Stop at the next doors, we need to get through there.” Ben said from above her. 

She did as he said and stopped at the closed doors,

“They’re shut!” She called above her,

“We will have to cut our way out.” He responded, stopping beside her. 

He pulled the red saber from his belt, she noted he was both of them. She had no idea when she had the chance to pick up hers and find his own. Holding on with one hand he lit up the sparking blade, stabbing it through the dark metal walls. Sparks flew all around them and he grunted through it, she thought about asking if she could help but he was too determined to disturb. Eventually he had the door cut open and they could slide through. Rey falling effortlessly on her feet and Ben slamming down with a thud. 

The noise had begun to die down in the black hallway they had found themselves in, the lights flickering above them, both struggling to stay on their feet at the constant shifting of the ground below them. 

“This way.” He ordered,

“Which is where?” She finally caught up to his long stride,

“The bridge, General Hux will know what is happening.” He said calmly, collecting the anger he seemed to have a moment ago yet his hunched posture was still aggressive. 

“The bridge! General Hux!” She screamed, stopping in her tracks, “What happened to leaving it all behind!”

The determination she had previously felt to her provoked and risky decision had shriveled into fear. Why did she say yes to the very man that has tried to kill her friends, her only family. Her answer seemed grounded originally, rejecting the Jedi, the Sith, the governmental struggle for power between both parties. The inexperienced side of her thought that in agreeing, all of the current conflict would stop and dissipate. That it would be easy,

“We can’t get anywhere without knowing what’s happening and without a ship. This one obviously seems compromised!” He shouted as he turned on his heels, grabbing her arm and continuing on,

“I am not your prisoner anymore Kylo Ren!” She shook him off her arm. 

Oh why did she say yes, why did she think this would be the fix to her problems?

He growled at the name, and the way she spat it out of her mouth like it disgusted her. He shut his eyes, breathing deeply through his nose,

“Rey,” he tried again, “We will leave this place as soon as I am aware as to what is happening. I am taking you to the bridge with me, wait outside until I have spoken with Hux and tell him a lie that you escaped.” His voice was calm and steady, “I will tell him I’m chasing after you, then we will escape.”

“Then what!” She responded much louder than his calm and collected response, fear and anger still coursing through herself,

“I don’t know!” He matched her volume, “I don’t know, okay? We’ll figure that part out later!” He fumed, angered that his collected response did not calm her. 

They stormed through the empty hallways, not a soldier in sight. As they grew closer to the middle of the ship, the lights stopped flickering and the ship stopped shaking. He was right, it was sturdier at the bridge. Still no men in sight, they stopped at two chrome doors,

“Stay put here,” he said, “If anyone stops you, kill them.” He placed the green saber in her hand, she took note that he had his own strapped to his belt. 

She nodded and rested against the wall, still feeling them vibrate behind her. As he strolled through the doors she had a sudden glimpse of the chaos behind them. Computers shouting at the operators, men ordering other men, a red haired monster commanding it all, 

“Hux!” He heard Bens voice boom over all of it. 

The door shut and she was felt again with the fear and reminder of the life changing choice she had just made.


	2. Two sides

He strolled onto the bridge, his cape following every echoing step,

"Hux!" Every head in the room turned from their busy stations,

"Ren." The red head snapped as he started towards him aggressively, "What happened? Where is the girl?"

"The girl escaped." He stated, not a tremble in his lie,

"What?" Hux spat, "She delivered herself straight onto your door step and you managed to let me escape?" 

"I was compromised." He said flatly,

"Compromised-?" Hux began, begging cut off,

"Supreme Leader Snoke was murdered." Rey felt the words drop from his mouth. For a moment she felt betrayed- how could he blame Snoke on her? She felt anger well inside her before it subsided, it was his only possible excuse. Hux would believe it and it would allow Ben to leave the Dreadnought without any suspicion. Hux would believe that Ben was chasing her if he thought Rey killed Snoke, it made perfect sense. She found herself almost laughing at her lack of trust and constantly jumping to conclusion. She was far too impulsive. But then again, how can one be too skeptical when beside the enemy?

"What!?" Hux screamed, his skin turning red with rage,

"The scavenger killed him and escaped in a TIE fighter." 

"How could you let this happen?" Hux pushed,

"Never mind that we have more important matters," he held his hand in protest, "The ships hull has been breached. What happened?"

Hux breathes deeply, trying to ground himself and to focus on the current matter. They could finish the logistics of the Supreme Leader later. 

"The resistance mother ship crashed into us off the starboard bow. Minor casualties but maintaining the ships structure has proved difficult." Hux motioned for Ben to follow to the bow, he pointed out the window, "The remains of the Resistance fleet is escaping to a near by planet Crait." 

Rey found herself is another dreamy state of watching Bens scene, but this time she was viewing through his own eyes. Something welled inside of her upon the realization, something she could not determine before seeing what was before him. A graveyard of destroyed Resistant escape pods, a few stragglers still trying to make it to the planet before them. 

"We have intel that there are remains of an old rebel base there, but it has gone unused for at least fifty years." Hux informed,

"Making their weapons inferior to our own. An easy win." Ben responded coolly,

"Indeed. We have begun readying your command shuttle to take us to the planets surface along with the AT-M6 fleet." 

"I️ will need my command shuttle. Take one of Captain Phasma's shuttles instead. I have full confidence in you." Ben said slightly turning away from the scene of escape shuttle remains,

"Excuse me?" Hux questioned,

"I will be leaving to chase after the girl and the Millennium Falcon. I will need my shuttle." 

"Running off from the fight Ren?" Hux sneered,

"I️ am running to the fight, Hux." He spat. 

Rey had seen enough. She released from the vision and stared back at the wall before her. She heard footsteps stomping down the hall in unison, but not towards her,

"The two captives have escaped with the TIE fleet towards the surface in one of our shuttles." A metallic, cold voice echoed. 

This peaked her interest. Two captives? She focused her energy on the ship bay she knew was below her. Finn, and... a girl? She could see them, they were here. They escaped. 

"Follow them." The voice commanded, "Captain Phasma is missing. Perhaps murdered. We will continue on with or without her."

"Yes sir." 

The boots clicked on again until faded out of ear shot. 

Finn. 

Her best friend. She has not even seen him since that day in the forest. She had not had the chance to say thank you. He cane back for her when she thought she was utterly alone. He saved her. Her heart swelled, maybe she would never see him again. All because she made a choice to run from all of this mess. She was lost and confused and didn't know where she fit in. So she chose to not fit in, to create a path far away from here. No Jedi, no Sith, no resistance, no first order. She thought we was a coward, running from everyone who has tried to help her. 

Except for one, she wouldn't run from Ben. She still felt it in him, it was there. The light. He wanted to help her refine her skills, she needed to help him find himself. She had to, it was the only way to restore balance. Maybe that's all she had to do. Find Ben Solo in the mess of Kylo Ren, and then they can return to the Resistance. They can return to Leia and Finn and Poe and Luke. The thought calmed her. That's all she had to do, save Ben, return to her friends. 

She sat a moment longer, listening to the ship hiss and creak; obviously struggling to maintain itself after losing 20% of its hull. 

"Let's go." She looked up, a black gloved hand extended down,

"Ben" she sighed, his mouth parted slightly at the sound of his name. 

"We must hurry if we plan to leave before the evacuation." He informed her as he pulled her to her feet, 

"Evacuation?" She questioned,

"The ship is holding for now but can't support much longer, they will have to evacuate to the TIE fighters, shuttles and to the rest of the First Order Navy Fleet ships." 

He finished, realizing how close he had pulled Rey to him. Her eyes level with with collar bones, but gazing up at his lips-no- his eyes. She breathed shakily before he dropped the hand he didn't know he was holding,

"Come along." He murmured, she shook off the tension,

"Where to? We couldn't possibly be going to the ship bay whilst the stormtroopers are still evacuating." 

"Of course not," he said as she struggled to stay with his stride, "We are going to my quarters first. They are not far." 

She almost protested, believing that taking items from his bedroom might not be the most important thing at the moment. But knowing they couldn't leave yet she followed.

She followed closely behind him, failing him by just a few feet. Something about that pleased him. The fact that she trusted him to lead the way, or just how close she was. At one point a few storm troopers shuffled by. They slowed down at the sight of Rey, but Ben shifted himself to stand in front of her, shadowing her from them. His stare alone made them hurry away. His glare was more intimidating than that mask ever was. It was both a shield to hide emotion and a hinderance from his natural intimidation. 

Before she could realize it, she was following him into a handprint locked room. The room was black. Black mirror floors, black velvet walls, a desk with documents and maps displayed on the hologram, and a king sized bed in the middle of it all, red comforter. 

"Rey"

"Rey! Are you listening to me?" She snapped her head to take on Ben, "You'll need to change your clothing. If we have to land on a planet you will be too recognizable by First Order allies. There is a droid in the closet, it will fetch you whatever you tell it." 

"Got it." She nodded, searching the room for anything that looked like a closet. 

He silently walked to stand beside her and tapped the wall in front of her, it glowed a chrome color before revealing a closet with literally, nothing in it but a pair of boots and the droid. He turned over her shoulder to thank him. He was shirtless again. She felt heat flush to her cheeks, she hitched her breathing and looked forwards, away from his exposed body, so close to her own. But now that she was with him in person she could not find the words to protest his bared chest. 

She instead chocked on her own spit. He raised a bushy brow at her gagging noise,

"Change your hair as well." She felt his middle finger loop into the middle bun, she froze, "No one else in the whole Galaxy has this hairstyle." He whispered softly, she didn't have to look to know the smirk on his face. 

She took a moment to gather her thoughts and slow her pathetically racing heart. 

"You don't like my hair?" She murmured,

"I didn't say that."

She leaned down to the black droid and tapped what she thought was its head. A pair of gray eyes sprung to life,

"You are not Master Ren." The droid stated flatly,

"It's ok KT7," she followed the voice to Ben, still shirtless. She turned away embarrassed,

"Umm, I'm gonna need something that... uh makes me... fit in a crowd?" She asked the droid, unsure if it will understand her request,

"You are not Master Rens size." It stated,

"I hope not!" She gasped until she could feel his eyes burning into her back, "Er, I mean... I'm 5'7" and 130 pounds."

"Right away ms."

The droid spun and receded into a perfectly droid sized compartment. She waited on his red bed, it was unsurprisingly hard. She watched Ben shuffle a few things into a backpack. He had changed into black pants, a black leather coat that reached to his mid thigh, a black turtle neck and gloves. Somehow he didn't look any different in this outfit that he did in his other outfit. 

His room was surprisingly sturdy. It did not shake nor hiss like the other parts of the ship did. He explained that the ship was hit on the other side and it had adapted to stabilize itself for a long period of time, but it was still urgent enough to evacuate the ship. 

"When you were on the bridge," she started, "Hux said they were sending men and destroyers to the ground."  He visibly tensed,

"Yes that's right."

"Will... will my friends—?" She began,

"Your friends?" He stressed the last word,

"Poe Dameron and Finn... and- and Leia. Will they be okay..." she paused, "if they aren't already dead."

"The traitor and his friend escaped for the plane surface disguised in a First Order shuttled. They will be fine. We don't shoot down our own." Somehow that reassured her, "And... my mother... Leia Organa. She's alive. You would have felt it if she was not. The fighter pilot is probably with her."

In his own, cold, emotionless way, that comforted her. Her friends were on the planets surface, and Chewbacca knew the plan. He would fly to and rescue them whenever the homing beacon was signaled. 

"I know about the Millennium Falcon and that Wookiee." Ben interrupted her thoughts,

"You... you do?" She questioned, panicked,

"Yes. But General Hux does not. I don't plan to stop their rescue. Their is no point in it now." 

She dropped her head, relieved,

"But they will not last long. The First Order has already bought out many of the Resistance allies. They will be rescued and be alone. No resources, no where to go, no chance at survival." 

Rey gripped her fists into the bedding, how dare he—

"Master Ren your order!" The droid squeaked from the closet. 

Rey popped up quickly and strode to the closet and grasped the clothing that had ended up on top of the droids head. 

She turned around and say Ben staring, arms crossed, stoic,

"Don't you have a bathroom or something?" She spat. 

He place a hand on the wall beside him, opening just the same as the closet did. She eyed him as she shuffled into the, surprisingly, white bathroom. His eyes following her the whole way until she found a way to shut the door. He had something in his head, she didn't like it. 

The clothes fit fine. Gray leggings, black shirt, black leather vest that crossed in front of her body. Some how completely different but still her. She pulled at each bun, the hair falling around her shoulder, slightly curled from the buns. She never had her hair down, but it would help hide her face in public. 

Once she was knew for sure the outfit would be enough to hide her in public, she stepped out the bathroom. Ben turned to face her at the sound of the door. His large lips parted slightly, she could see his tongue press against the top of this mouth. She brushed hair behind her ear, a nervous instinct. She felt the tension return in the air, she coughed to try and clear it but it was no use. His eyes were fixated on her and her hair and her outfit. 

"Nngh," he made a barely audible noise,

"What was that?" She murmured, half hoping him to tell her she looked good. 

He shook his head, physically clearing this thoughts, he didn't need this distraction right now. They had to escape first. 

"Nothing. Let's go."


	3. Fancy Fruit

The air craft bay was utterly destroyed. Dead bodies lay on the grounds and broken machinery scattered the area. The sirens were still blaring about the bay, fires flamed in piles about the room. It was eerily silent as the sirens echoed. The whole ship had been evacuated and would be left as debris. Although it was stable now, the engines were blown and the structure was not fixable. Ben said the First Order would agree that it would be easier to buy a new ship than fix this one. All the remaining ships were destroyed, the rest on the planet surface with General Hux. 

The TIE fighter and carriers filled with AT-M6's were probably beginning towards the Rebels now. She cringed at the thought of what those things could destroy but she had faith that Chewbacca would not let her down and complete the evacuation  

His shuttle was all black on the outside with wings that sat pointing upwards. The external ramp took them to a platform, straight ahead was the bridge/ cock pit (too big to be a cock pit, too small to be a proper bridge, but perfect size for two people). To the left was a kitchen with a small sitting area and a holographic computer. To the right was a bedroom with one single bed. Up a latter next to the bridge was the engine and a generic maintenance room. 

They walked into the black bedroom last, Rey took one look around the room and wondered how this arrangement was going to work. Ben responded like he read her mind, maybe he did,

"I will sleep in the sitting area or on the floor." He nodded, "But never mind that now we have to get going."

She agreed and they flowed onto the bridge. Ben sat in front of the helm and started meticulously flipping switches and pulling levers until the engine started up. He obviously had done this a time or two. Rey plopped down in the weapons control. She was useless in this ship. It was far newer than anything she had ever worked on so everything she looked at was foreign. 

"Master Ren." A com system sprung to life beside Ben, she fell out of her chair and tried to hide but quickly realized they couldn't see her based off of Bens frown at her, 

"Yes General." He responded to what she imagined was Hux,

"Return to the coordinates I'm sending you now when you are finished. We have no time to waste with reconciling what happened here today with our allies. We need to contact them immediately and ensure that the death of the Supreme Leader will not weaken the First Order." 

"Understood." He groaned,

"I will return to one of the remains ships after we are through here. Do not damage the command shuttle whilst on this little escapade. It is a too valuable piece of equipment." Hux spat,

Ben clicked the com off before responding to him. 

"What are you doing?" She questioned,

"What?" He cooed,

"You are still in communication with General Hux?" She asked,

"Yes. He needs to think he knows what I'm doing or else he would follow us." 

"You can't run away from the First Order while telling them information!"

"Rey!" He spat, "It is not that simple."

"And what when you don't return to those coordinates? Shouldn't we be using those coordinates to destroy the First Order?" She pushed and pushed, her voice slicing through the air,

"That's enough!" He boomed, "There are two of us and thousands of them not to mention allies across the Star system. The First Order will destroy itself without proper leadership eventually."

The shuttle suddenly lunged into the air through the open bay doors. She let the argument slip from her, now was not the time to discuss the logistics of what they were going to do. She needed to save the light in him, yelling will not help. They sped to a safe distance from the Naval fleet and jumped to hyperspace. The jump was smooth and barely noticeable. A worlds difference from the Millennium Falcon. 

She spent a great deal of time sitting in the chair, both saying nothing but the tension diminished further the farther they got from the fleet. She felt jealous watching Ben navigate his ship, she thought maybe watching him she could learn to fly something this fancy. Poe would teach her if he was here. 

"I can teach you later once we have made a bigger distance between us and the fleet." He cooed without taking his eyes off the space before him,

"W-What?" She stammered, how could he know exactly what she was thinking all the time,

"I saw you staring at me. I assumed it was because you were watching me pilot." That made sense,

"Oh. Right." She shook her head, so paranoid, "I can learn from watching." 

"I doubt that." He almost laughed, belittling her, 

"You doubt my ability as a pilot?" She spat, who was he to judge? He really shouldn't be testing her right now,

"No, but I do doubt your ability to only watch and to master this shuttle."

"I can wield a lightsaber without being taught, obviously!" She growled and pointed her attention to the scar across his upper body and face. 

His hands balled into fists as he turned to stare her down,

"Watch it." He growled. 

She scoffed and walked off the bridge to the kitchen. She was surprised to see that the fridge was fully stocked with food. She wondered what lucky storm troopers job was to put food in the shuttles. 

"Stupid, stupid, bad idea..." she angrily muttered to herself. 

She scolded herself for always letting him get into her head and under her skin. Any little remark pissed her off, his monotone voice that can go from fine to angry in seconds made her go mad. His stupid sparking light saber, his annoying sarcasm, his witty answers, his messy hair, his piercing eyes... his big lips... oh she was so confused. 

She grabbed a box of crackers and some strange looking fruit and plopped down on the couch in the sitting area. There was a game sitting on the table that looked an awful lot like the game that sat in the Millennium Falcon. She briefly let her mind imagine a young Ben learning from Han to play this game. Maybe that's why he put this game in his personal shuttle. She shook the thought from her head, she was mad at him no time to be falsely nostalgic. 

After a while of eating the crackers she decided to conquer the triangular shaped fruit. She tried to peal it but it wasn't budging, maybe you just bite into it. 

She heard footsteps while inspecting the fruit and looked up. Ben was walking into the room. He took a moment to look at her but then turned away. She felt her body tense just by looking at him. She felt like they would fight every day they were here together. She just had to get to him, bring him back to the light. She had to cool his burning heart. But from what she has seen so far that was going to be much harder than she originally thought. 

She angrily took a bit out of the fruit. It was tough and bitter and gross. Her face twisted as she tried to chew it. He grabbed the same fruit and a knife and started to leave. 

"You're not supposed to eat the rind." He remarked to her bitter face. She hated that he always knew more than her. 

He turned and returned to the bridge to gently cut the rind off his fancy ass fruit while shit spit hers in the sink.

Hours later after sitting in the engine room and trying to study it, Rey returned to the bridge. He was still sitting there. The shuttle surely had auto pilot but he seemed determined to not leave the chair. She asked where they were heading, he said they were to go to Takodana. She recoiled at first, not wanting to return to the place she was stolen from and kept as prisoner. But he reassured her it was a neutral planet, no Resistance or First Order relationship. It also had plenty of resources for them, shops to buy food, water, clothing, ship parts, even weapons. 

Later that night Rey peaked into the bridge, he was still sitting there. He was doing nothing, nothing but staring at the stars in front of them,

"Um, Ben?" She said quietly,

"Hm?" He hummed, still turned away

"Are you hungry?" She asked. He turned his head slightly so she could see his profile,

"Are you?" He asked softly, her stomach grumbles loudly before she could answer, "Ah, you are." She saw a gentle smile come across his face. 

"Uhh-Ha, yeah." She stammered, "I was just, you know, wondering... if I made something, would you-would you eat some too?"

"Oh," he sounded surprised, "sure."

She opened the fridge and scanned through what was there. Not many things that she recognized, many things too foreign for her to understand. She found some kind of fish-textured meat in a packaged. She decided that that, potatoes and bread would do fine. 

The stove top worked the same as hers in Jakku worked. She put butter and some herbs in the pan and let the fish cook while roasting the potatoes beside that. It took longer than she was willing to wait so she picked pieces of the bread loaf off and ate that to calm her talkative stomach. 

It smelled very nice, but she feared he wouldn't like it. She didn't know what Kylo Ren ate every night. Probably alone in his room no doubt, but what food did he like the most? She couldn't even attempt to guess. He probably could live off anything protein ridden and be fine. 

The fish finally looked cooked enough, even though she wasn't sure what the mystery fish was supposed to look like. She made herself a plate and put it at the table. She made Ben a plate with almost double the amount of food than hers, he looked like he could eat a lot. She started to walk towards the bridge to give it to him, he probably wasn't going to leave even to eat. But he left the bridge and was starting towards her. He furrowed his eyebrows at the plate in her hand,

"I can eat in the kitchen." He stated, taking the plate from her hand and strolling past. 

He put it down across from her before opening a cabinet she had not yet checked out. She sat and picked at her food, not wanting to eat until gaging his reaction on the taste. From behind her she heard a familiar sound, the hop of a cork in a liquor bottle. He brought a short glass over to him seat, it had a few ice cubes and was filled about 1/3 of the way with a honey-brow color liquid. Whiskey. 

She sipped nervously at her water, while he picked up his fork,

"Feels fish." He stated,

"Oh, is that what that is?" She asked, he nodded his head while taking a bite. 

He didn't recoil from it but also didn't say anything. The fact he took another bite lead her to believe he liked it enough. She sipped her water again,

"You don't drink?" He asked, taking a long draw from his glass,

"Well I—I guess...not." She replied. 

She had tasted alcohol before but always associated it with the dirty traders on Jakku. 

"I haven't had much before." She began eating her food, it was really good. 

She saw the glass slide across the table before he said anything,

"Try it." He stated,

"Oh, well I don't... well... why not." She took a sip and immediately hissed through her teeth, "Oh god." She laughed, earning an equally playful laugh from Ben, "Oh that's just awful!" 

She laughed and chugged water. 

"Take that awful drink away from me," She pushed it towards him. She looked up to see him laughing. His smile spread across his face, spreading to Rey's,

"Not for everyone then." He smirked and opened his hand, the glass slid back to him where he could take another drag. 

The conversation was surprisingly simple and easy. They talked about the types of drunk people she would see on Jakku, he laughed at every description of half asleep men falling over their own feet into the sand. He had a few of his own stories, apparently when he was younger he would go into bars sometimes, hiding his identity of course. He sometimes would make up fake names and fake stories to tell the people at the bars. He recalled one identity he had once. Someone asked his name and he couldn't think of something fast enough so he blurted, "Ban Dolo". She laughed so hard at that tears ran down her face. 

She noticed every story he told was from "when he was younger". Nothing ever in the past five years. Probably not much to tell when you're trying to rule a Galaxy, no time for fun.

Rey cleaned the dishes, Ben sulked off somewhere again. The ships laughter died and returned to the sound of space whirling by. She thought about how he had actually not said anything about the food, but he ate it. So that had to be a good sign. Then again he might have been being polite. She laughed to herself, Kylo Ren is not polite. 

After finishing the dishes she turned into the bedroom, she was exhausted. Though, she actually has no idea what time it was. It may have been the middle of the day but she would never have known. Space was annoying like that. 

In the room she saw Ben sitting on the ground with his back against the wall. There was a blanket thrown over his legs and a pillow behind him. This is what he must have meant about sleeping on the floor. He had a tablet in his hand, he tapped the screen and looked at her when he noticed her entrance,

"Reading?" She asked,

"Yes." He cooed. 

She was confused as to how they went from laughing goons to this coldness again. It was like she had sucked up all the joy in this black ship and now there was no more to inhale. 

She yawned as she approached the bed. She wasn't going to protest getting to sleep in it. But she might have protested the fact that he was facing her. She kicked her shoes off and sat down on the bed. She didn't have much clothing to wear besides her current outfit, so she would have to sleep in it. 

She tugged at the bun she had wrapped her hair into and her locks fell around her face. She shook her fingers through the brown hair and rejoiced in the feeling. She didn't notice his eyes staring at her, watching every move. Once she did her cheeks got warm and she looked away from him. He noticed every time Rey watched him. Perhaps Ben was also staring at her and she didn't notice. 

She laid down and turned away from him. There was a window beside the bed, watching the stars fly by released some of the anxiety pent in her. She had made a decision today. She wasn't sure yet if it was the right one, or the one that would ruin her. She needed more time to figure out how to pull Ben Solo out of Kylo Ren. She shut her eyes and hoped she was strong enough to find the light. 

Ben flicked the lights off. All he could see was the soft outline of her body in the window now. Listening to her laugh was majestic. The most beautiful thing he had ever heard. He would have told her a million more stories if it made her laugh like that. Although some of the stories were a little less friendly to dinner talk. He avoided the plethora of stories that involved getting into fights and all the stories about finding new storm troopers. 

He had been awake for over forty hours now. He hadn't been able to get much of any sleep since their minds began connecting. He would lay awake and think about the things she said, over analyze every syllable, and recall every movement on her face. But now she was with him, escaping into the Galaxy with him. It was beyond him why she said yes but he knew he couldn't ruin it. He needed her. They were meant to rule the Galaxy together. Side by side they would prove themselves to everyone. They would see. He just needed more time to build her trust. 

"Rey," He murmured into the dark room,

"Yeah?" She said sleepily, turning slightly,

"Your cooking was good." He whispered,

"Thank you Ben." She smiled widely to herself, but her joy was so contagious he could feel it from across the room, "The company wasn't so bad either."


	4. Conflicting Dreams

He felt them before he saw them. He felt the panic, the regret... the shame. Then he saw the dreams. Her dreams. She stood before Luke Skywalker, the old man asked her if she was happy with herself. He asked her why she didn't resist it. But she couldn't respond. Her mouth wouldn't move, her lips wouldn't part. She could only fall to her knees and cry as others gathered around her. Leia and Han. The three of them stood before her, asking her why she did it. Why did she run from the light, why did the dark lure her in? How could she be seduced so easily? She could still come back. He's gone, one voice said. He's not worth saving, another said. Come home. She couldn't defend herself, she couldn't respond. She could only cry. 

These weren't dreams. They were actually there, in her head. They were reaching out to her, calling her back to them. They were taking her away from him. 

He felt her body shaking, her felt her heart pounding, he felt her mind swell with confusion and anger. Like thunder rumbling through a canyon. The feels echoed through her body into his. He shared her pain. He felt the shame, the regret, the panic. 

His eyes flung open, finally he could escape Rey's mind. Rey wasn't in the bed, she was standing above him. He breathed heavily, he couldn't explain why but he was afraid. Her cheeks were stained with tears, her eyes were red and puffy, her hands were balled into fists beside her. She didn't say a word. But her body shook as she looked at him. She looked disgusted, betrayed. She left her family in the Resistance for what? For him? What an awful trade, he thought. 

The intensity of her eyes did not waver, he was pinned to the wall, unable to speak to her ferocious glare. The glare that broke his heart. He didn't know why but his chest tightened and his body went cold. The moment either lasted for an eternity or a second, he couldn't tell which. He was trapped in a moment with no time. A moment where nothing existed but Rey and her anger, all directed into him. 

"Rey..." his voice was pathetic, shaky and unsure. 

She didn't respond. She only cried. 

What was she doing here, why did she agree to this. What were they even doing? What did she think would happen by taking his hand in Snokes chamber. Leia and Luke and Han were right. She needed to return to the Resistance. He couldn't be saved. The darkness enveloped him more everyday, and if she wasn't careful it would infect her. 

She couldn't save him. She wasn't strong enough. She couldn't even resist him. 

She finally shut her eyes and more tears slipped down her cheeks. She could no longer look at his terrified face. She could no longer break him apart with her stare. 

She left the room. She went into the bridge and sat in the pilots chair. The only thing that comforted her now was the stars before her. Endless and constantly expanding. She heard him sigh from the other room. 

She knew he was watching her dreams. She knew he could see them all telling her to come back. 

She felt so alone. A girl, lost and confused and angry among the stars. A girl who couldn't even trust herself to make the right decision. She should have said no. She should have killed him in those chambers. Or else he would haunt her the rest of her days. She knew that to be true. There was no escaping Ben Solo. There was no cutting this sting that tied their fingers to one another, and their souls. She was trapped here. 

—

That morning she left. They landed on the planet and she packed her bag. She stared at the saber that sat next to her bag. She left it. Ben called at her, asking her where she was going. She didn't answer. She didn't want to talk to him. She made a mistake coming with him. 

The town was busy and full of people of all kinds. She noticed people who looked like they have enough money to own this town, and people who begged for a single unit to the passerby's. She looked regretfully at the beggars. She had no money to spare, no money at all. 

Her first stop was a small market. She hated doing it but stealing was not a new thing to her. Back on Jakku she had to steal sometimes to stay alive. She didn't take much, only what she would need for the day: a loaf of bread, some fruit. The shopkeeper didn't notice, it was too early in the morning for the keeper to be fully awake. 

Her next stop was to find a ship she could stow away on.  Or perhaps a ship that would take her somewhere in exchange for manual labor. She needed to get off the same planet as him. 

He watched her walk into the unknown town. Trudging through the trees they landed in, determined to get away from him. 

Thinking she would agree to running away with him was pathetic. He knew she had the intention to turn him from the very beginning. He sensed it in her the moment she said yes. But he didn't care what her intentions were he just needed to be with her. He couldn't control that urge. 

He did want to rule the Galaxy with her. But before that, he needed to gain her trust. That's why he chose to leave the first order and go far away with her. They would train and learn to trust one another. He could convince her to rise to power with him. They could let go of the past and everything that hurt them. She could forget her parents, Jakku, Han, Luke, Leia, the traitor, the Millennium Falcon. She had to let go of it all to move forwards. 

But that dream proved she can not simply let it go like he had. And that inability to let go was what would drive them apart, as it was now. He was going lose her to it. 

But the connection he felt. It was like she was the other half of his soul he didn't know he was missing. Or like his heart was filled with so much anger, and somehow she replaced that anger with her laugh. How could she abandon that bond? He couldn't. That intensity they felt when they touched hands, it was unworldly. It was the most powerful thing he has every felt. Powerful enough to overcome anything, even this. She could leave him, but she would never be gone. She would come back. He had to hold onto that, she had to come back.

She had found nothing in the last few hours. Nothing but unfriendly people and dirt. The jungle was lush around her but the town was dirty, she felt more unclean now than she did in all her years on Jakku. She found herself becoming more anxious and upset with every swat at a bug landing on her plump skin. 

She could not forget her dream. Or maybe she would not. She had been so foolish and weak to be seduced to agree to this. She didn't want to rule the Galaxy, she didn't want to take over the First Order. She didn't even want to create a new order. She just wanted to bring Ben back to his mother, back to the light. This was not how she was going to bring him back. 

"Young girl?" A voice croaked from behind her. She turned to find the owner. An older man, a black hood over his head, salt and pepper hair with wrinkles dragging his face down. His back hunched like he had been in an accident. 

"Oh, hello." She put up a fake smile, keeping her distance,

"Do you have shelter?" He asked,

"I'm sorry, what?" She asked at the blizzard question, shelter for who, him?

"There's a storm coming, you shouldn't be out here long." He waved his hand to the clear, blue sky,

"Is that so?" She asked, furrowing her brows. 

He smiled and nodded, using a wooden cane to walk away from her confusion. 

"Don't pay no mind to him." A middle aged shop keeper assured,

"Is there a storm?" She asked, approaching the woman,

"Doubtful. Old John likes to walk around and tell fairytales and far fetched predictions." Rey smiled, "But it would be wise to find a place to rest soon, once the mine workers come back things can get pretty rowdy on the streets."

Rey thanked her and went on her way. She was much too far away from the ship and too determined to turn around. If either of them were right, she needed to find somewhere to rest. 

Ben saw the walls shake before he heard them. The storm came suddenly and unrelentingly. Like Rey's awakening. He came to the bridge, looking up at the sky and at the trees as they struggled to hang on to the earth. The wind vortex was all around, blowing sideways, skyward, downward. The rain followed that same path. Soaking the earth so quickly it flooded a few inches in the first ten minutes. 

Rey. 

He pressed the ramp release, the door began to open but he quickly realized he couldn't even get outside. Water washed across his face and into the shuttle. He couldn't go out there. His heart started to pound, falling into rhythm of the banging on the shuttles exterior from the stress and rain. 

He ran to the helm, maybe he could take off and look for her. Maybe if he could just get airborne he could find her. She surely was out there alone, in the storm. 

The screen in front of him flashed in his face,  
Unable to take off. 

Unable to take off. 

Unable to take off...

"Dammit!" He screamed, cracking the screen with his fist. 

He couldn't get to her. Not on foot, not from the shuttle. He couldn't help her. He was trapped here. Wasn't he?

He sat down on the floor, his head in his hands. He breathed deeply, letting his chest full with air and then fall. His lungs filled with quiet and exhaled the anger, stress and panic. He shut his mind off from everything but one thing. He reached out,

Rey 

Rey

Rey

She hasn't noticed she had been walking for hours. She had already eaten the stolen fruit and almost all of the bread. She tried stopping and sitting but someone always shooed her away speaking in a tongue she had no mastered. She has yet to find a friendly pilot. She has tried talking to at least three but they all laughed at her offer. A free ride to wherever they were going for labor... from a woman. Maybe if she was a man, finding a ride would be easier. 

She was tired of walking, tired of rejection from every stranger in this town. Last time she was here it seemed way nicer of a place, back then it seemed beautiful. But that was before the First Order landed here and attacked. It was when Han Solo was with her, with the Millennium Falcon and Chewy. The memory was fond, landing here with him to find his friend, Maz. But since then it has been tainted. The memory of Han Solo destroyed. Maybe the First Order destroyed this towns resilience too. 

She was too trapped in her mind to see the three men approach her. They were dirty and greedy with their eyes. One grabbed her wrist, the other her shoulder, the third spoke,

"Where you thinkin you're goin?" 

"Ah-Hmf- what?!" She tugged at their grasp on her, struggling to get free,

"I said, where you think..."

"I heard you!" She screamed, "Let go of me!" 

She looked around her surroundings to see why no one was helping. But the sky was orange and the sun was setting. The people were all gone home. 

One mans hand glided down her sides, touching every inch of her body, greedily,

"No weapons... I like that." He said dangerously close to her face. His breath was swimming in alcohol. She recoiled and tried to kick him, screaming.  

"Let me go!" 

Her mimd became more fuzzy every moment the men had their hands on her. She could hardly see them through her eyes. She was filling with anger like boiling water, swelling inside of her. 

"Now I cant just let's a pretty lady like yous wander all alone."

The other two filthy men laughed. Disgusting. She kept struggling against them, yelling foul words at them,

"Feisty aint ya..." 

The sky rumbled, and then split in half with light. 

"Naw, shit." The third one said. 

"We better get inside Tella," the one holding her wrist said,

"It would be wrong to leave this lady in the rains." He smiled a disgusting, toothless smile. 

As the sky opened and poorer relentlessly on them, they hauled her into a nearby building. She tried to put her feet up and stop going into the doorway, but the third one-Tella, slapped her. 

She was thrown to the ground of the musty, concrete floor. That was there mistake. She jumped to her feet and collected all the anger in her veins. Her anger at Ben, her anger at her choices, her anger at the attackers, and her fear. Her fear, her strongest emotion. She gathered that too. 

She held her hand out ferociously, they three looked like they would laugh. But before they could she had lifted the leader into the air,

"H-Hey! Put me down! I saids put me..." 

She heard a crack as she tossed him against the wall. 

"What-What are you lady?" The other two shook in terror as she approached them. They raised their hands up, pathetically. 

"S-She's a Jedi mate!" The other shrieked,

"That can't— ahhgn!" 

They screamed as she shoved them aside into their limp friend. She stood before them and raised her hand again, one of them was raised to his feet... and then off the ground. He grasped at his throat, 

"Please!" The one of the ground called, "Please! My brother! Please!" 

Her eyes went through him like daggers, the mans face turned purple and eventually he stopped struggling. She let him fall to the ground on top of the other men. 

"You're no Jedi! I thought the Sith were extinct!" The man cried over his friends' bodies. 

She flung the door open and stepped into the rain. 

She fell to her knees. Her head pounded, or was it her heart, or both. Her whole body shook. She had never felt that kind of hatred, and that kind of anger. She felt tears fall from her eyes, mixing with the rain stinging her back. That power had never coursed through her body... that anger unlocked it. She cried out of fear, fear of what she just did. Afraid of the power she had when she accessed and manipulated the anger. 

Just like the training with Luke, she couldn't resist the darkness. It gave her something she needed, power. And she abused that. She couldn't do this on her own... she was so scared. She didn't want to go down that path, she didn't want to feel like that anymore. It wasn't right, it wasn't natural, it wasn't good. It was clouded in rage and anger, she was blinded by it. She never wanted to access that again. 

Rey...Rey...Rey!


End file.
